你好吗？

朋友，你好吗？... 

哦哦...  我？不是很好... 

为什么叻...？

嗯，很孤单... 没娱乐... 没outing... 没在一起... 无聊，不用讲叻～ 

也不差啊... 

可是我的是闷到............................................................. 自闭症，发神经，废话很多，会聊到话题不容... 

×××××××××××××××××××××××

老实的说，我想找个某某人聊天... 废话也无所谓... 为什么总是觉得，都没有话题聊的？每次要开口聊，有的对我感觉是死死的... 是懒得聊啊？没空啊？接不下去？烦啊？还是无聊啊？

我啊，来的这边快一个月了... 来看看我到底有多闷... outing 0 time, eat outside 3 days, eat together 0, sampat 0, clubbing 0 (impossible go one laa), play together 2 days (via skype with Tong and Leo). 

别的，没什么印象~ 

也有几位啦～ 愿意跟我废话的~ Why Chuong & Doreen 咯！当然，有够废的... 哈哈哈～ 最厉的还是... 

就这样，他们就是酱可爱～ 哈哈哈～看几次还 jing ma ho ciu arrh~ ! 

我好像在这里浪费着我的青春... 算一算在这边大概已经两年啦 ～ 都没什么和谁谁谁一起去玩的... Melbourne 好玩咩？有人说好玩... 那是你有伴... 咳～

好想回国继续读下去而不是在这...，很想和一群 <疯人> 一起，...被传染后不顾着面子地一起疯～ 

是啊～就是一群疯人～ 跟他们一起什么烦恼就消失了～说真的... 那才叫青春！

同时，看着看着某某人的照片～ 我好嫉妒啊... 嫉妒到睡不好，LoL ! 我很想进入到你们的生活，一起打拼～ 跌倒就彼此鼓励～ 一起玩～

我好想念我的中学...  大学生活过得，过得很，很郁闷... 也好想念同学... 尤其是抱头的那几位~ 好久没看到他们啦... 只怕马来语不会讲罢了... 哈哈

想着想着... 就想到小学，然后就是幼稚园... 啊... 时间过得真是TMD快 ...! 老人言真是事实啊!! 

My grandpa, looking great =) 虽然不是很了解他，但是他很好

有时后，太想你们也不好... 

因为太在乎别人了往往会伤害自己...  像我说的，感觉死死的... 咳... 现在，只有回忆带来给我快乐了，还有祂的支持...! 

Mee Mee, Emy, Ah Kang, Ah Tong, Darrel, Daniel, Danny, Ah Leo, Qin Qin, Doreen, Sean, Arnold, Greg, Afizah, Suraya, Siti, Marion, Jeet, Chan, Lam, Chow, Kee Hui, Xiao Yan, Wei Jie, Ah Rong, Johnny, Rachel, Lee Leong, Ming Fong, Yee Ling, Peter, Amy, Rouffy, Keng, Why Chuong, Jia Min, Abby, Vero, Hui Lung, Jerome, Fei Jing, Eileen, Candy and ... (couldn't think of whom anymore)... 

（可悲... 只能listed 这几位among 480+ in Facebook ... 真正，知己的朋友其实真的很少... 朋友们感觉变得, 越来越少... 我圈圈好小哦... those not listed don't feel sad or whatever ah! )

Anyway, 你好吗？How are you? Apa khabar? Kawan yang lonely saya ini, rindu kamu orang sudah... kamu rindu saya tak? Kalau yes, saya malu laaaa~~~

Wah seh, I feel so 'Tze Hau' writing all these in Chinese~ applause for me please~ =DD 

思念

今天下午，他打了电话过来... 好开心，聊几句... 但都是关于到我的 Assignments 和 科目事情... 还好...

可是刚刚在晚上，她打过来问候... “还好吗？“ - 之类的... 才聊了几句... 我就听到她的口音有些不对劲... 那时... 我也开始忍不住了，很想赶快挂电话... 可是我舍不得，很想再听她的声音... 就酱我撑住着... 继续聊啊聊... 结果我真的忍不住了... 就这样，哭得说不出话来... 不小心让她听到... 八成听到了吧，也... 

(电话就这样挂了...)

... ... ...  然后我就这样... 像小孩子一直哭... 一直哭... 今晚我流了好多... 好多泪... 流到眼睛好干... 

我也搞不懂为什么... 现在只是好想... 好想见到他们... 真的好想家...

(我写不下去了... 看了照片又哭... 我不懂已哭了多久... 大概有半小时了吧...? 哈哈... 好可笑... 头一次哭酱久... 眼睛也觉得肿肿的... 觉得好累... 好累... ) 


Nevermind...

Bless me Father... first of all, thank You for answering my prayer... =") 

What I Saw

Today, I am doing practical on the field. As usual, travel long long... walk long long ah...

I woke up at 6.00am (after snoozing my alarm at 5.45am),

took my earliest bus at 6.54am,

took my express train at 7.14am,

reached city at 7.38am,

changed another train at 7.44am,

reached destination at 8.06am,

walked few kilometres and reach at 8.30am at the 'Yarra Bend Park',

shit-ed in the toilet in the building at there,

sat down and listened to the briefing at 8.36am...

(You think I am making a movie of Rush Hour meh?)

What I saw is, in big city... everything have to be rushed, every minutes is important (if you don't wanna being late to bla bla bla)

During the field prac, I almost had a blackout! Seriously... but its not the first time... Last week I squad on the ground for too long and I lost my balanced after standing up and consequently I broke my Uncle fan(standing fan).

somehow broke the fan familiar with this one

(PS: Didn't take real photo of the pity fan, because being thrown away on the second day lol)

... and today, too - squad for too long until...

"Woooah",

"Are you okay?"

"Ummm, I feel so dizzy"

"Do you need a rest?"

"Yes please..."

so mentarokan! Because after I stood up, my ass hit the ground so hard until, "Ouch" ... my lecturer and other 2 members saw it happening >.< ~ After I took my short rest my friend asked me,

"What happened to you today? You looks not so well",

"Well, I guessed I just baked under the sun for the whole morning and... yeah",

"Oh, okay... so what did you see just now?",

"Errr, I dunno! Everything just black! And I couldn't remember a thing at that time!"

therefore What I saw is Black at that time... as simple as that~ (cold) 

Other thing is that, while waiting for the bus to get home just now... it was after school so there were students everywhere - road, path, school gate, station ---- what the hell am I bullshitting ... (skip!)

The main point is... they were so noisy and some of them even smoke! WTH? They even keep using foul language in every sentence during their conversation and seriously really WTH? No respect at all! I still remember last week, I posted a status about "pretty...bitch..." something. It was about a girl teenager kept yelling at her friends (having fun) without respecting other passengers on the bus. Total no respect at all until the bus driver said,

 "WOULD YOU SHUT UP! COULD YOU RESPECT OTHER PASSENGERS! YOU BLOODY IDIOT!" 

... all of sudden that bitch just kept silent until I got off.

Thus, what I saw is most teenagers I encountered are so immature and disrespectful. Only few are opposite... Correct me if I'm wrong but this is "What I Saw". 

Then, about friends... well, technically should be about Facebook 'friends'... may I know why some of people having so much friends on Facebook? (eg. 1000-3000) Honestly do you have so many friends? If so, how good are these relationships in your life? Or you just felt that it identify your status - means you're a more popular person, more nicer person, easy to get along, got sexier look? cute look?? Self love(自恋)???

(No offence at all, or envy thought...) 

What I saw is that many people in Facebook very ...做假, too unreal. Did you ever saw friends post a profile picture that very cute/pretty one? And after that did you saw them post awful status or stuff like, "WTF, F***, go to hell la, go die laaa, knn" or whatever? 

(No need to put picture at here, just look into your Facebook and 'stalk' them ~)

I doubt if you will say 'no'. There is sometimes I just don't know who can I rely upon to give me emotional help and support in a time of need... Lim beh jin jiak LONELY at here....! Maybe this is Melbourne? Full of strangers with stranger surroundings therefore no one I could rely on. 

By the time I talk about this, I guess I only have... well not much that have deep relationship with friends over the 'not-real' of total 465 friends in Facebook, plus 100+ friends request that I didn't approved.

Next!

Its been a while my parents didn't call me, even though I've been in Melbourne for 3 weeks. I really hope to hear their voices right now, just to have a comfort. 

I Do Not Like Here At All

I'm been too far from homeland, and what I saw was I've been acting like a baby ever since I came here but I couldn't help me self being independent. I have a long thought that I hope spending more time with them together as overall in our lifetime... just think of yourself =) 

I don't know why do I say these, but... its a long post yeah? 

So bye.

Desperate

I just had gone through my first aka tough week in Melbourne and I still not getting used my 'new' life. Everything is just so difficult for me... to adapt - transportation, people, school stuffs(which I forgot what I've learnt), surroundings, cultural, and other sorts of thing you could think of. 

Melbourne is just soooooooooooo "People mountain people sea"... Melbourne is just sooooooooooo big... Melbourne is just sooooooooooooooooooo "$$$$"... Honestly, I'm an introvert. Which mean I seem like dislike getting new friends, OR maybe I just have a poor social skills OR I just not 'ngam' with Ang Mohs? I felt so lonely over here... No outings, no face to face chitchat, no long lasting conversations with friends over here as there's no topic to chat about/mix with... (if you asking me to find a partner, then save your time lecturing me bah). 

I also hate big cities as they're always filled with awful air and I always became a second passive smoker. I never get a fresh air to breathe in such places. I hate being in a place with big crowd because I would always overheard a foul language coming from 7 out of 10 people, especially the word "F"... and honestly I also hate my old friends saying that... (you know who and who lah). 

About living cost? Everybody knows one lah... "Why foods/goods always rise, rise, rise but salary no rise one??" On Saturday, my transportation fee would rise by a few percent...! I still need to stay here for at least 5 years leh BOSS ! I was trying to save my money since I came here for study! No snacks, no supper! What the heck? My tummy growls everyday now matter how much I ate! (maybe not that much in case of saving $)

My academic pula... very huang no... played too long I guess~ Feels to lazy to get through them and therefore my assignments, HUANG NO aarrrrrHuaaatarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr~~~

One word to say about my current life over here...

"SIEN"

(not Rachel Yap Si En...)

(Ok if feel cold please ignore it.)

I am praying (sometimes) that I could, hopefully maybe there's a transfer study to my country one day, pray for wisdom, pray for patience, pray for financials, pray for my health(not fully recovered after 2weeks), pray for faith and for everything that I'm encountering with right now. I just feel so depressed... Like weekends, I'm so lonely and bored. I wish I could socialise... like picking up my phone then play SMS,

Scenario 1
A: Want go yam cha??
B: Ok oh, when? Go where?
A: Fetch you first then say lah
B: = = ok
A: Reach at your house liao
B: swttttt

Scenario 2
A: Tomorrow do what lor? Boring leh...
B: Dunno oh...
A: Go Sibu play eh? Got movie watch?
B: Errr, me cincei aa.... neh that "XYZ" movie ah, ppl say it nice wor...
A: Hmm, ok then~ u go find ppl bah~ i find "C,D" you find "E,F"
B: ok ok~~~~ haha!

... during back times! But ... in big cities, go to a place take you an hour or half an hour to travel... How tiring? SO unlike Sarikei everywhere just 5 minutes within driving.
(PS: I didn't play SMS on my handphone for DAYS already ...pathetic!)

Ok, I'm quite tiring of complaining... for now~ Eheh~ by the way, my tummy growls when I wrote these... Hope can have a bowl of Wantan or Kampua right now... what a sad case...! Sigh~

Dear Hectic Life

As I mentioned, hectic life~ you know how is it look like la..... for those in Semenanjung M'sia one~

"O my dear Hectic Life, how shall I fall in love with thou?",
"... as my soft, weak, faithful heart is belong to Sarikei..."

"Forgive me."

Ok, enough. Complain starts...
1. I miss Sarikei.
2. I miss my family, friends and pets.
3. I miss my bed, my entertainments.

4. I miss mom's cooking.

5. I miss the cheap cheap, yum yum price of foods, especially

6. I miss everything.

Ok, I'm done selecting random pictures because these memories just keep flashing around my head as I browsed through them and which made me moody -_-" 

Haih... memory is always better than reality! Reality is just so so cruel! Time flies! Look at me! Envy I got 4 month holidays? It ended just like that! Ciuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu~* like a rocket! 

Honestly, on the 26th of Feb that day... I cried as I stepped into the car to go to Sibu airport... That feeling, is just so, so, so heavy and emotional. My Dad sit aside me yet, ... so 尴尬 ! I cried all the way along to Sibu, so ...

Not yet arh, I still crying at night... I mean in LCCT waiting my flight to Melbourne. I was sms-ing with some of my friends to kill my 4 hours time of waiting. Dunno why, my eyes just soaky wet and of course, there's a lot of people that time! Hopefully nobody sees me _-_ ~ (There's definitely someone saw me crying, OH MY GOSH~* >,<)

Ok, goodnight! (If not gonna fall asleep during lecture class again... still more complain to come huhu!)

Its been a while I didn't touch my blog already~~ I mean, like for months? XD

I don't know why, I ought to blog something tonight... but I felt that I was too lazy, maybe still thinking what to talk about eh? Nevertheless, I will write something, which mostly about my condition over here... meanwhile show off some beauty snapshots too! Ahar~

Erm, by the way... I'm still not fully recovered... So SiEn... got sexy voice like Doreen! Issshh! SORE THROAT!